Ain’t buying this bullshit

Women are all up in arms about this lady posting this pic of herself 4 days after birth and they’re all mad because she’s skinny. That’s not why Im mad. If you’re a tiny fit ass lady to begin with and keep it up the whole time you’re pregnant of course you’re going to look good post birth. Pregnancy doesn’t ruin your body, fucking french fries and netflix marathons do. Here’s what really bothers me about this picture…

1. Obviously this woman has had a shower and done her hair. WHAT? No new mom has taken a full proper shower this close after birth.  AND she had time to blow dry that long ass hair? I call BULLSHIT.

2. 4 days post birth your boobs hurt so god damn bad you don’t want anything touching them but maybe a sports bra and ice packs. My nipples felt like they were set on fire and then run through a cheese grater. Who’s trying to feel sexy when they’re breastfeeding? I call major fucking bullshit on the push up bra.

3. UHHHHHHHH wear the fuck are the giant underwear that houses the giant industrial strength pads you have to wear post birth? There is no way this woman isn’t bleeding out clumps of whatever the fuck comes out for the next 6 weeks just like every other human woman on the planet. Unless? I call robot.