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Shit storm 2015

May 12, 2015

It’s been a really crazy roller coaster this year so far. I kind of feel like I’m in a batting cage without a bat and the machine keeps whizzing balls at me faster and faster. 

Here’s the haps: my dads cancer is back so he’s going through some shitty ass chemo, I’m in the process of a divorce (I hate that word but I think conscious uncoupling might be even worse), I’m renovating a new place while trying to pack up the old place to move in less than 2 weeks, my sweet goose pup died suddenly, the woman who isn’t biologically my mother but sure as shit stepped in and raised me right has been diagnosed from out of nowhere with extensive lung cancer, and this past weekend salty was robbed. My computer contained all my sales records for the last 5 years and tons of personal information and it’s just gone along with lots of other things. 

I’m not quite sure how I’m doing. That probably makes no sense. When I was in the army one of the things we had to do was go into a closed up building with our gas masks on and then remove them then stand among whatever poison gas they pumped in for a certain amount of time. I’m extremely claustrophobic and just having the gas mask on my face would make me start to panic not to mention breathing in the gas that burned your eyes, nose, and throat out. Somehow when it was time to take the mask off my survival instincts kicked in (yes I know this wasn’t a life or death situation here but it still fucking sucked) and I was able to keep myself calm by breathing very small shallow breaths. The more you panicked the more you’d inhale and the worse shape you’d be in. I kept my shit together and because I didn’t panic and act like a fool the drill sgts were kinder to me and let me out of the building sooner than the people freaking out. So that’s what I’m doing now I think. Breathing shallow breaths and waiting to be let out of this test. 

I had an idea. After I get salty back up and running I’m going to have a re-opening/ lets restore our faith in humanity party. A percentage of the day’s sales plus whatever other cash people want to donate we will send to St. Jude’s. In reality things could be worse for me. My daughters and I are healthy and able so let’s pull together and give to kids who aren’t as lucky as we are. 

I’ll keep everyone updated on the details and date when I figure it out.

 And for gods sake, be good to people. 

2 Comments leave one →
  1. Nathaniel permalink
    May 12, 2015 7:51 pm

    Great short article. My problems nowhere near match yours, and your strength is admirable. Keep your head up! I plan to attend this reopening.

  2. Solaria permalink
    May 12, 2015 8:50 pm

    Hang in there. Shit storms always hit all at once and we are never given anything we can’t handle. Major changes and shifts only create room for positivity to grow, and it sounds like things are unraveling to make room for somethin better. Life struggles also force us to level up and evolve– what better version of you will emerge from these ordeals?

    Breathe, be love, have faith

    It will always work out

    Be brave

    You are loved

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