The Second Half

Bill’s grandpa passed this week at the age of 90. He was married to his wife for over 60 years. 60 years, 8 kids, a thousand grandkids and about a million great grand kids, what a giant , wonderful life to have woven.

I’ll never be married to anyone for 60 years but I want that.

When Bill and I separated he said “don’t you want to date a bunch of people and explore?”. NO, i told him. I’ve done that. I’ve dated people, I’ve put on the dumb outfits and hurty shoes and gone to bars, I’ve gotten to know people, I’ve internet dated, I’ve put myself out there and I’ve fallen in love a million times and been through all the endings that follow. That’s the first half now I want the second half.

To me the second half is knowing that you have a partner for life. A built in best friend that will be there to cheer you on & cheer you up. Your person. The person you want to dig through life with. Someone who will evolve with you instead of standing still. The person you respect and learn from and with. The person who you can be honest with and can be honest with you. The person you’re going to share your grandkids with, the person who is going to be standing next to you when you’re at your weakest. The person that is going to help you take care of your aging parents and then your aging self. The person that is your family. (The family that you actually like, and claim, and want to be around.) I know that it’s a relationship that takes work and maintenance. It’s the one that will benefit from not making any of the mistakes you made in relationships past and the one you know you’ll choose to work out instead of move on from.

I don’t have 60 years left to give anyway, but I have a good 30 left in me and I hope I spend them in as much peace as I can with a real cool dude.

Here’s to the second half and to everyone who’s been a great person to their person, especially in those times when you thought about just burning the house down and walking away.